Get "Carrie"d Away!

The Hills

I can't wait until 10:00pm (eastern time), when...."staring at the blank page before you, open up the dirty window..." serenades from the television screen. The Hills will be on tonight and here's my prediction: Heidi's definitely going to go back to Spencer, Lauren's going to meet someone in Paris (okay that was on the trailer, maybe she'll get back with Stephen, throwback!), but the rendezvous will only be a fling, Audrina will continue to make weird choices in men, and Whitney will always keep her personal life a mystery!

iBikram

Bikram Yoga....a room heated to 115 degrees, sweat protruding from every empty outlet in your body....yoga postures of Bikram Choudury, designed to strengthen and restore health to every part of the body. I heard about this new yoga trend years ago, from an ex-co-worker from my spiff in the Spa industry. She said it was addictive, and when you leave, you feel rejuvenated and ready to start a truly great day! Well, that was years ago, and a few hours ago, I swallowed that traditionalist view on exercising and walked into hell, metaphorically of course!

If hell is like this, then I'm repenting as we speak, I thought to myself as I reluctantly strolled into the room. Several other frequenters of Bikram were already situated in their ready-posture. Lying prostrate, or standing in what I think was called, pranayama. Okay, so I tried to do a little research...but nonetheless, I went in with an open-mind.

Inhaling and exhaling hot air is really challenging. You are allowed to bring your water bottle with you, but after 30 minutes of hot air...your chilled water bottle, takes on an abnormal room temperature! But the real doosy is when the workout begins, and the heartrate increases, parallel to the body's way of exhaling impurities through sweat. I promise you, we worked out parts of our body that I didn't think you could. I heard the instructor say, "this posture works out your colon." Unbelievable! Now I can take a "number two" with assurance that I'm stretched everywhere!

Bikram Yoga lasts 90 minutes! Yes ma'am (or sir), 100+ degrees and no whiff of cold air, never! There's only two (spoken) water-sipping breaks, the other sips you have to sneak-in during posture changes. However, every posture challenges not only your body, but your mind. I had to convince myself to attempt each asana, moreso than my legs and my arms. Eventually I knew that it would take time to adjust to a body that moves like a pretzel, but the mind is the key apparatus in yoga. The mind needs to be free and open to where the body can go.

Enough of the testimonial talk...although my lungs burned and I poured an embarrassing amount of sweat onto the beach towel below me, I was amazed that I made it the full 90 minutes and I never wanted to quit. I'm addicted to the feeling that overcomes your body as you walk out of the building and into real air. Will I go back? Well, the instructor says that you must revisit within 24-48 hours so that your body can be accustomed to not only the postures, but the heat exposure. Immediately after the class ended, the other frequenters gave me a round of applause for my virgin experience. Women in the locker room made me feel even more at ease with my life-changing decision. Stick with it. Be patient. Every time you come, you feel different. The women testified as we reconvened in the ladies' locker room.

Overall, it was amazing, fun, quite the energizer and I hate to sound cliche...it was hot!

Pop Kulture

So I'm bored. Suddenly, while vacationing in Boredom Resort Hotel, a thought evolved. Jump on the pop culture bandwagon and phish for some pics of celebs in fashionable looks. Groundbreaking huh?

Miss House of Dereon, can I have those Balenciaga shoes!

Ciara and Ashlee Simpson at BCBG show....did someone get a nose job?

Amy, Amy, Amy...what can I say? I'm an Amy Winehouse groupie!

I know this isn't an everyday look...but Jurnee Smollett looks stunning!

I Am Who You Want Me To Be?

It's inevitable that we all partake in judging everyone. Seemingly so, we tend to judge a person by their actions and stamp then with that label for as long as we know them. She's always the girl that got around with a lot of guys, and he's always the guy that had commitment issues and slept with anything walking. But then, we get older, and if you're like me, I may have done the things that you say I did, but I am not who you say I am. Basically what I'm trying to say is this...we all have a past. I'm sure in your past and mine, we can find some things that we wish we could erase and things that we are ashamed to admit or be proud of. Some things you probably can't believe you said or did, but, it happened. However, it is not apart of you. You did it years ago, maybe even months, but if you've changed, geniunely apologized, and learned from it...then why continue to subject yourself to humility because others can't seem to forget?
I had a friend. Yes, we were very close. I had my faults, yes I did...but I slowly realized after several attempts on my behalf to mend our friendship, it wasn't worth it! I recognized that she wanted to punish me and make me pay for the one "kink" in our friendship. I'm sorry, if kissing your ass is the price I have to pay, then pull your pants up. I'm not going to degrade myself or integrity because of your own hang-ups.
How long does a person continue to put you under the umbrella of a substratum of your life that is now complete a blur? If you think for one second, that you are definable based on a weak moment in your life years ago, then you are sadly mistaken. And if that person continues to remind you of it by giving you a cold shoulder or a frown, it's not your fault! He or she just simply does not want to forgive and forget. So they would rather hold onto your skeleton and turn that light on in your closet every chance they get. They are still living in the past and sadly, they want to remember you, maybe even forever, as the situation that caused the two of you to part. Not the wonderful human being you've become today. Feel sorry for them, the fact that they've missed out on your metamorphosis and the blessings that you've been afforded as each second and minute passed without them. You're more than a friendship with him or her, truthfully, you are who you say you are. Even today as I write this, I understand now, that each moment is an opportunity to change something. No we can't make anyone else happy or even appreciate the person we've become....but what we can do is let our little light glow and hopefully it will reflect more than a skeleton, it will illuminate the spirit that we were designed to shine!

B.S. Ointment

I need some relief from something that's definitely become a nuisance....metaphorically speaking, a parasite. It's call bullsh*t and maybe it deserves a treatment that's been around for years. Blue Star Ointment, a topical analgesic (the retro Neosporin), used to be the highest rotating commercial (via radio broadcast) back in my mom's and pop's day...but I'm thinking that back then there wasn't too much bullsh*t going around. Just jock itch and ringworms! But the B.S. has hit an all time high and I think we've outdone AIDS and hit a pandemic! I don't know, maybe it's just me...but if you've got some B.S. that's giving you more than an itch....sign the petition...because the B.S. has got to stop!

Signed,

KeShaJo

Stuff Educated Black People Like

In an effort to show off my unbiased approached to humor, my girl Kia over at Yummy411 put me on to one for my black folks! It's also hilarious as ever!

Here are some of the things we supposedly like:

First Fridays (that's the truth!), turkey bacon/sausage (not me!), natural hair, townhomes, business cards, etc. etc.

Check it out for yourself!

"Stuff White People Like"

I can't take credit for this one....my bloggirl over in Denmark posted this site on her page. So, being the nosey chica I'm not ashamed to be, clicked the link and within secs I was amazed at its content. The name of the blogsite is Stuff White People Like . No offense to my readers of the caucasian persuasion, but in true 90's slang, "this joint is funny!"

Here's a snapshot of the list: marijuana, black friends, coffee, t-shirts, non-profit organizations, the Sunday New York Times, Manhattan (now Brooklyn too!), etc., etc.
However, there's one that I'm sure they left out that was purely accidental....OPRAH!

DISCLAIMER: Please don't think I'm a racist, but I do tend to enjoy an occasional laugh! Even if it seems ignorant...hey, I'm not perfect!

Text Message or "Send"

I pick up the phone and text my friend, "Remember to set your clocks an hour forward tonight." Innocent and not even that big of a deal to call and interrupt what conversation could be going on. So much for my trying to be convenient...I'm later told by him that I could easily pick up the phone and press "send". While that might seem easy to do, I still don't see the problem in texting a piece of information that doesn't require feedback. Why I might accent this text with a typical "How are you today?"...He may reply and even ask the same of myself. I may reply as well, but really people, has texting become a nuisance? Now, I do have a cousin that only communicates via text messaging. She will not pick up the phone and will have long pages of information that I'm sure could be easily communicated the conventional way. I have another cousin, who once texted his mother, while he was using the bathroom that "there's no toilet paper"! That's purely ridiculous!

Now, I've sent long pages of text (mainly to vent my feelings at the moment), without the interruption of the intended audience. As you can see, I'm really good at expressing myself in type....but in conversation, sometimes I hit it on the head, while in most cases, I forget what I'm supposed to say and miss the whole point of my thesis. One look, one word, and I'm sidewinded speechless!
So if you're reading friend....it's not that I don't want to talk to you. Most of the time, I know that you're busy and may not have time to talk. So, in an effort to put my Public Relations degree from Hampton U into practice, I try to keep those things into mind. I'm not trying to be bothersome by texting, it's quite the opposite. From now on, however, it's "send" everytime.

iGreen

The Incredible Hulk wouldn't feel like the odd-ball in the new wave of an environmentally-friendly buying conscious. I knew we'd struck Green when, while shopping at Wal-Mart, I witnessed the Green movement! Placing my items on the conveyor belt, a couple before me were already supplied with reusable shopping bags. They proudly told the cashier, "We don't use plastic bags." The cashier seemed to be unfamiliar with the new "green" option, but bagged their groceries anyway, unmoved by the couples' pro-global choice. I, on the other hand, gave the couple a pleasing nod, and couldn't help the remorse I felt as my groceries were bagged in those hazardous, polyethylene, plastic bags. So, what did I do? What I normally do when I want to know more, get on the World Wide Web and find ways that I can be apart of the Green Team!



One of my friends had this bag as one of their MySpace wallpapers. After clicking here and there, I found this fashionable, linen-and-cotton shopping bag at Vivre.com for only $28!

Organic style. An online eco-boutique, where everything from flowers to pet stuff to clothes, keep the environment in mind! Most of their clothing is made from organic cotton. What's the deal with organic cotton? Organic cotton is made from 100% organic cotton growth. That means, no pesticides or agricultural chemicals. It's whitened naturally with hydrogen peroxide instead of toxic chemicals!

The Hybrid Car. If you're like me, you're wondering, "Why would I purchase a hybrid car? And what is it?!" Of course I'm a fan of foreign cars, domestic in some cases, but in the light of booming gas prices, I'm looking for the next car that's going to give me more miles for the gallon. So how do they work? They are a combination of fuel and electric and require a battery replacement at about 80,000 miles to keep the car running another 80,000. Wow! Sounds amazing huh? Well, the only thing that kinda turns me off is the fact that the battery costs anywhere from $5,000 to $8,000!!! Also, hybrid cars cost more than our gas-guzzlers and don't accel to those zooming, police-chase speeds! But, if you're willing to pay more, in an effort to help our fragile Earth, then get the keys to a hybrid!

If I was a RICH GIRL...

"If I was a rich girl...nanananananananananana...said I'd have all the money in the world, if I was a wealthy girl...." I remember dancing with my shoulders and hips to that reggae classic by Lady Saw. Imagining the finer things, accenting a size 6 derriere that men could never resist.

Fast forward to present day, size 6 plus, and you have a 20-something female hoping that one day, excess money will be one pin-number-away. I'm talking about plus six figures and me exercising my right to withdraw! Nonetheless, I would love to invest, save, and triple my profit margin. I do not want to get caught up in the spending hype, like so many youngins do, in an effort to accelerate full speed ahead of the Joneses. I want to be wise in my spending and humble in my appreciation of the dollar bill. Let's face it, our dollar bill has lost its international appeal and has become the victim of a worldwide celebrity roast! "Hahaha, you stupid dollar," ridicules China, England, France & Italy.

This up-and-coming RICH GIRL would like to pull the plug on making it paycheck to paycheck and embrace the income bracket of exercising philanthropy if so desired! A shoe closet that makes you drool and a lifetime supply of Duracell batteries...you know, just in case! : )

Giving Up Is So Hard To Do

I'm not a quitter. Maybe that's why it's so hard for me to give up with anything, including a relationship. I don't want to lose at anything, but I definitely don't want to wave the white flag as a sign that I've succumbed to the intensity of the test.
Recently, I had no other choice. I had to give up. I had to release myself and realize that there was no use in staying and trying any longer. The bell had rang, the towel had been thrown long ago, I stood on a battlefield with a restless contender. I'm tired and he's still bouncing on his toes throwing butterfly punches. Although men complain about the complexity of women, they've neglected to include themselves into that equation. Men are more confused about their feelings, which leads them to showcase their lethargic state in loud silence, retreat, and a heightened isolation from the situation. Well pass the batton to me! I feel you and as the mountain of relationship after relationship ascends, I've passed the plate of remaining in frustration and serenading to the "I Surrender All" anthem.
Donny Hathaway said it best...Giving up is hard to do, when you really love someone. But I tried, but it's just no use!