A while ago one of my best friends asked the question on her blog about true love and soulmates... "maybe I do believe in true love but do I believe in soulmates... I don't know, are they different or are they the same"
I replied the following and thought I would share with my popular audience on love, a four letter word that is completely taboo and may get you a year-to-life death sentence if used inappropriately. Of course we've all had conversations about it, but it's really hard to discuss it honestly with the ones that need to hear it. Once upon a time ago, we heard songs about it. People discussed the ramifications of falling in love, the good and the bad. Everyone could relate the circumstances of their relationships to what was being sung on the airwaves. Now, it's easier to bang up headboards, than to unconditionally give another person your heart. Crazy huh? Anyway, here's my reply to my friend's blog. Feel free to give your opinion on the matter.
The "soulmate" adage is something that I feel is very circumstantial (thanks for that word yesterday, I added it to my book of words). It's not a virus you catch, it's something that if your heart is open to it, then it can happen. However, if your heart is closed, cold, bitter, resistant to change, biased and conditional...then no, you'll never give your "soulmate" a chance to appear or better yet, you'll use him in the wrong capacity (i.e. booty call). A "soulmate" to me is someone that is destined to be your companion on this Earth. He (or she) was divinely created for you and you for him (or her). Even as the two of you crawled in diapers unbeknowst to one another, you were already appointed the place and time to meet in the future. I also believe, that if you missed the date, because you were with Mr. Asshole and he was with Ms. Bitch, there is still a chance for the opportunity to re-present itself. It all depends on your faith and how far you are willing to hold out for real love. We've all had our "booty-calls" and "one, two, three night stands"...and we can tell after 5-minutes into the initial meeting, where it's going. But if he has potential, pull the reins on your ass and hold out. Get to know him...as I have recently learned, be patient! Get to know who he is inside and out. You may be surprised. But nonetheless, you love yourself like you've never loved you before. Take yourself on trips, get spa services, look captivating (as you do anyway) and have this self-confidence (not arrogance), that let's any man know that steps into your path the standards he has to uphold to be with you. Put your foot down, but firmly pull it back when you see it necessary. If you believe it, then you will send an Amber Alert for your soulmate and at the most awkward and opportunistic moment he'll be there. Of course you won't know it. And you'll unintentionally, brush him off as just another guy you've met. But love does conquer all. Like I said before, love will have its way...it will be if your heart is open to it...if it's destined and you're ready for it...His "will" will be done! He's your soulmate and that's solid....no getting around that. Nonetheless, you can not turn a "waist of time" into a "soul-mate". Some people are truly only in your life for a season. If it's the cold, cold, winter with their ass..then by golly turn up the heat, pick your leaves off the ground, and go into 2008 with spring on your mind!
I replied the following and thought I would share with my popular audience on love, a four letter word that is completely taboo and may get you a year-to-life death sentence if used inappropriately. Of course we've all had conversations about it, but it's really hard to discuss it honestly with the ones that need to hear it. Once upon a time ago, we heard songs about it. People discussed the ramifications of falling in love, the good and the bad. Everyone could relate the circumstances of their relationships to what was being sung on the airwaves. Now, it's easier to bang up headboards, than to unconditionally give another person your heart. Crazy huh? Anyway, here's my reply to my friend's blog. Feel free to give your opinion on the matter.
The "soulmate" adage is something that I feel is very circumstantial (thanks for that word yesterday, I added it to my book of words). It's not a virus you catch, it's something that if your heart is open to it, then it can happen. However, if your heart is closed, cold, bitter, resistant to change, biased and conditional...then no, you'll never give your "soulmate" a chance to appear or better yet, you'll use him in the wrong capacity (i.e. booty call). A "soulmate" to me is someone that is destined to be your companion on this Earth. He (or she) was divinely created for you and you for him (or her). Even as the two of you crawled in diapers unbeknowst to one another, you were already appointed the place and time to meet in the future. I also believe, that if you missed the date, because you were with Mr. Asshole and he was with Ms. Bitch, there is still a chance for the opportunity to re-present itself. It all depends on your faith and how far you are willing to hold out for real love. We've all had our "booty-calls" and "one, two, three night stands"...and we can tell after 5-minutes into the initial meeting, where it's going. But if he has potential, pull the reins on your ass and hold out. Get to know him...as I have recently learned, be patient! Get to know who he is inside and out. You may be surprised. But nonetheless, you love yourself like you've never loved you before. Take yourself on trips, get spa services, look captivating (as you do anyway) and have this self-confidence (not arrogance), that let's any man know that steps into your path the standards he has to uphold to be with you. Put your foot down, but firmly pull it back when you see it necessary. If you believe it, then you will send an Amber Alert for your soulmate and at the most awkward and opportunistic moment he'll be there. Of course you won't know it. And you'll unintentionally, brush him off as just another guy you've met. But love does conquer all. Like I said before, love will have its way...it will be if your heart is open to it...if it's destined and you're ready for it...His "will" will be done! He's your soulmate and that's solid....no getting around that. Nonetheless, you can not turn a "waist of time" into a "soul-mate". Some people are truly only in your life for a season. If it's the cold, cold, winter with their ass..then by golly turn up the heat, pick your leaves off the ground, and go into 2008 with spring on your mind!
1 comment:
I don't believe in soulmates in the romantic sense. I don't believe in the concept of "the one"--that's mathematically absurd. Tom Robbins says we waste time looking for the perfect lover instead of creating the perfect love. Even still, "perfect" is a dangerous word in the mouths and minds of the immature and inexperienced.
I recently (like, today) wrote about love myself. www.moxiesblog.blogspot.com
Thanks, nice blog.
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